Sunday, February 8, 2009

Experiences....

You know, it's amazing how time goes by and things get shoved aside.  I apologize to all of you for not keeping up with this.  

The last couple of months have gone by so quickly.  I am amazed that we are just about to the middle of February.  Life has continued and lots of things have happened.

I will try to share some feelings here that I hope no one will be offended with, but they come from my heart.

(I would suggest you turn off the music I have on this blog at this time.  It isn't exactly the right type of music for this posting.  You can turn it on when you feel like later, but I don't have the right feeling of music for this one as it is a little more "sacred" than the music I offer here.  Thanks!)

A couple of weeks ago, our stake had a special conference.  We had a visit from Elder David A. Bednar.  He was down here in Arizona for other purposes, but requested to meet with our stake because our stake had not had an Apostle visit in many years.  Nick and I went early so we could get decent seats.  We got there at around 7:30 am and already found a few people waiting to get into the building.  As we waited, I got to thinking about what a wonderful opportunity this was to have an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ meet with us and that we were going to be able to be taught something important.  

The meeting started at 10:00 am.  Elder Bednar was in charge of the meeting and had requested to hear from our Stake President and his wife, then a couple of youth - a Laurel and a Priest, then we were favored to hear from Sister Bednar.  After we sang the intermediate hymn, Elder Bednar stood and began to teach.  I can't describe to you the feelings that were going on in my soul, but it was great!  

There was one thing mentioned in his talk that has stuck out in my mind very clearly.  He told a story of a young man he had become very close friends with.  The young man went on a mission and then came home and got married.  He and his wife had been married for a few short months and he was diagnosed with a quick spreading form of leukemia.  This young man called Elder Bednar to come to the hospital and give him a blessing.  Elder Bednar went to the hospital and visited with the young man for a little and then asked him a question.  They talked about faith and how important faith is in our lives and how having faith can heal, etc., then he asked this:  "Do you have enough faith NOT to be healed?"  He told the young man to reflect on this question and call him back if he still wanted a blessing.  A few days later, he got the phone call to come back, the young man wanted a blessing.  So Elder Bednar did return and laid his hands on his head and gave him a blessing.  Elder Bednar said he was not going to tell us the outcome, because that was not the point of his telling the story - the point was the question - Do we have enough faith NOT to be healed - do we have enough faith to live with the things we are dealt?  Do we have enough faith to endure to the end in whatever "test" we given - be it a health issue, a financial issue, a spiritual issue - it really doesn't matter - do we have enough faith to live through it?

I have reflected on this for the last couple of weeks and have asked myself over and over again, DO I HAVE ENOUGH FAITH TO ENDURE?  The Lord has blessed me so much.  I think about how He has spared me from having to go through a stroke or a heart attack, or something like that.  As I have sat in a hospital room dealing with blood clots and seeing how the Lord has permitted me to "dodge that bullet."  He has permitted me to stay whole, to be able to share my life with my loved ones, to be able to share my testimony through word and through my playing the violin.  He has given me opportunities to meet wonderful people and share my love for life with them.  AM I WORTHY OF THESE BLESSINGS?  WOW!!!!!

About a week after that visit from Elder Bednar, Nick and I had the privilege of attending a missionary meeting with Elder L. Tom Perry.  Again, it was wonderful!  I learned a lot in these meetings.  I also learned a little more about these two men.  They are true Apostles of the Lord.  They showed us that they have great senses of humor, that they have lived exemplary lives and that they love the Lord and His church.  That they love us.  It was neat to sit at their feet and be taught.  This also reminded me that these men are real.  Because of the growth of the Church, we don't get to meet directly with the Apostles like we used to and they have to use other means to teach us - mainly television and satellite (sp?), etc.  We only get to see them on a flat screen like watching a movie or something.  But, they are REAL.  Just as Joseph Smith is REAL.  The things he experienced were and are REAL - the Book of Mormon is REAL - it talks about REAL PEOPLE - they really did live and experience those things.  Joseph really did see God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.  THEY ARE REAL!  This is one of the most awesome and humbling truths that we have received.

Well, I know you are wondering why I have included all of that in my blog.  It's just that I love every one of you and am so grateful to God for giving me the opportunity to have had some kind of relationship with each of you.  I just have to share my feelings every now and then and thought this wouldn't hurt to do it here.  If anyone is offended, I am sorry.  Please know that I only mean to share how I feel and if you know me well enough, I will share my feelings about the Savior and His plan whenever I get the chance.

The Lord bless you all.

Tawna


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